It is essential to prioritize our mental health, especially for the LGBT+ community, during these gatherings. Family dynamics vary greatly, and some families may not be as understanding as we would like. Therefore, it is advisable to prepare with assertive responses: you can point out that certain comments are hurtful or inappropriate, or simply divert the conversation to a neutral topic. It is also completely valid to leave if the situation becomes too uncomfortable and seek support from friends or loved ones after the meeting.

Remember that, as LGBT+ people, we have an extended family made up of those who, although they do not share blood ties, make us feel at home with their love and understanding. This support network is essential to protecting your emotional well-being not just during the holidays, but throughout the year.

Here are some additional strategies that can help you take care of your mental health during these gatherings:

1. Set boundaries: Before attending, define what you are willing to share and what you prefer to avoid. Don’t hesitate to communicate your boundaries clearly.

2. Practice self-care: Take some time for yourself. You can meditate, exercise, or simply enjoy some alone time to recharge.

3. Find moments of escape: If you feel like the situation is becoming overwhelming, find a quiet place where you can breathe and relax for a few minutes.

4. Connect with your allies: If there are family members or friends who you feel are supportive, seek their company during the gathering. Having someone you trust nearby can make the experience more bearable.

5. Strengthen your support network: Stay in touch with friends and loved ones who respect and value you for who you are. They can offer you the emotional support you need before and after gatherings.

Remember that you are not alone and that your mental health is the most important thing. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if you feel you need it. With the right approach, family gatherings can become more bearable spaces and, over time, even opportunities to strengthen understanding and respect. Take care of yourself and enjoy the festivities in your own way!

The post Your Mental Health During Christmas Family Gatherings is Key appeared first on Sex Positive.

And although it sounds like something very simple to do, the reality is that strengthening your self-esteem and acceptance begins from childhood. From the concept that our parents have of us or the experiences we live with the people around us. Their words and actions transmit a message to us that will initially strengthen or weaken the interpretation, thoughts, sensations, feelings and concepts that we will have of ourselves and that we will collect throughout our life.

To develop a healthy self-esteem, it is important that we show affection to children, that we include them in family activities, that we speak positively to them, that we teach them not to judge or criticize others, and also, help them change their negative perspectives for reflective thoughts. Thus, during the course of their life it will be easier to surround themselves with people who add and contribute good things to their lives.

However, there are many adults who did not have experiences that validated their emotions and are now afraid to accept or express themselves. But, it is never too late to improve your self-esteem and accept yourself; you can start with small actions that will gradually improve the concept you have of yourself. For example, we can improve our self-esteem by doing the following practices:

1.-Understand that there are things that are out of your control and only focus on those that you can change.

2.-Get to know yourself, make a list of everything you like and another of everything you don’t.

3.-Confront your fears, ask for help, dare to make those changes that your mind is asking you to make.

4.-Love everything about yourself, remember that all human beings are extraordinary and different.

5.-Identify your patterns, break with those ideas or actions that you do only because you learned them but that do not bring you happiness.

6.-Learn to say no, establish limits that defend your rights.

7.- Recognize your worth, do not allow anyone to treat you disrespectfully or devalue you.

8.- Repeat positive affirmations, find everything you like about yourself and that gives you power.

9.- Compare yourself only to yourself, recognize your strengths and weaknesses, do not waste time wanting to be like someone else.

10.- Practice gratitude, in addition to having valuable things, human beings also have limitations, to connect with who we are we must first accept what we do not like about ourselves and be grateful for it.

Remember that improving our self-esteem begins with self-acceptance, which also implies accepting when we make mistakes and having the ability to treat ourselves with kindness and affection. Accepting ourselves is giving ourselves permission to be who we are, simply, imperfect people.

The post Acceptance and self-esteem appeared first on Sex Positive.

There are many….and let’s name them!

1. Better Sleep….Gratitude allows you to relax and enjoy a good night’s sleep!
2. Improved Blood Pressure…a grateful attitude may reduce hypertension and result in a better blood pressure!
3.   More energy…being grateful for what you have boosts your energy and enthusiasm for life! It gives you motivation to get out and be productive!
4.   Reduces Pain…when you feel thankful for life you tend to not be as aware of aches and pains. Your focus is aimed at positivity instead of negativity!
5.   Better Health…people who live with a generous spirit take better care of themselves. They eat better and have more interests to occupy their time. When you are a happy, positive person…you attract others who also enjoy your influence!
6.    Longevity…people who live a spirit of gratitude may also enjoy a longer lifespan. Less focus on worry and stress…more attention to the needs of others and being helpful! Remember…God loves a cheerful giver! And he promises a long life to those who follow His word!

So reflect on these attributes of a grateful heart and enjoy this holiday season with friends and family. It’s the season of GIVING and THANKFULNESS….May we all be truly blessed!

The post 6 healthy benefits of a grateful heart! appeared first on Sex Positive.

According to TGEU’s annual Trans Murder Monitoring project, 350 trans people were murdered worldwide in 2024 – and the year isn’t over. That’s up from 321 in 2023, marking what researchers are calling a “significant increase.” Nine in ten (93%) of the reported murders were of Black or Brown trans people, a 14% increase from last year. And here’s the gut punch: we know these numbers are just the tip of the iceberg, since many deaths go unreported or are misreported due to deadnaming and misgendering by authorities and media.

Here in the US, we lost at least 29 beautiful souls to anti-trans violence this year so far. Let that sink in. Twenty-nine people who just wanted to live authentically. Twenty-nine families grieving. Twenty-nine communities with holes that can never be filled.

The Numbers Don’t Lie (But They Sure Hurt)

According to the Human Rights Campaign, here are the stark statistics from 2024 for the United States:

• 76% of victims were people of color
• 52% were Black transgender women
• 59% were killed with a gun
• 35% of victims with a known killer were murdered by a romantic/sexual partner, friend, or family member
• 41% were misgendered or deadnamed by authorities or the press

The Lives We Lost

So far, in 2024, we lost:

• San Coleman, 48, a Black trans person known as the “life of the party” who never missed a family function
• Honee Daniels, 37, a Black trans woman with a charming personality who could “make anyone look like a movie star”
• Kassim Omar, 29, a Somali trans woman who fled to America seeking safety, only to be killed by hate
• Redd (also known as Barbie), 25, a Black trans woman who dreamed of opening her own beauty business
• Tai Lathan, 24, a Black trans woman remembered as “a sweetheart” by her aunt
• Vanity Williams, 34, an Air Force veteran and Black trans woman pursuing nursing school
• Dylan Gurley, 20, a trans woman killed in Texas
• Monique Brooks, 49, a Black trans woman and amazing hair stylist who advocated for LGBTQ+ rights
• Shannon Boswell, 30, a Black trans woman described as “one of a kind” and a “sweet soul”
• Kenji Spurgeon, 23, a Black trans person whose family called them “a bright light in our lives”
• Pauly Likens, 14, a trans girl who “lit up every room she entered”
• Liara Kaylie Tsai, 35, a trans woman, activist, and DJ
• Tayy Dior Thomas, 17, a Black trans girl described as “shy but so fearless”
• Jazlynn Johnson, 18, a trans girl taken far too young
• Kita Bee, 46, a Black trans woman who was “her authentic self through and through”
• Andrea Doria Dos Passos, 37, a Latina trans woman whose community showed up to honor her life
• Starr Brown, 28, a Black trans woman known for her “uplifting words”
• Nevaeh “River” Goddard, 17, a nonbinary teenager with “an amazing, outgoing personality”
• Tee Arnold, 36, a Black trans man who loved travel and was always there with encouragement
• Meraxes Medina, 24, a Latina trans woman and makeup artist who loved Jurassic Park
• Alex Franco, 21, a trans man remembered as “an athletic, cheerful man with a big heart”
• Diamond Cherish Brigman, 26, a Black trans woman described as “larger than life”
• Reyna Hernandez, 54, a Latina trans woman who achieved her dream of owning her own salon
• África Parrilla García, 25, a Latina trans woman remembered as “like a sister”
• Sasha Williams, 36, a Black trans woman who dreamed of performing in Las Vegas
• Kitty Monroe, 43, a Latina trans woman known for her painting, singing, and sense of humor
• Righteous TK “Chevy” Hill, 35, a Black trans man who created inclusive spaces for the LGBTQ+ community
• Michelle Henry, 25, a Black trans woman described as a “ray of light”
• Yella (Robert) Clark Jr., 45, a Black trans person who died while incarcerated

The Political Reality

This violence doesn’t happen in a vacuum. With Trump’s victory and the looming specter of both Agenda47 and Project 2025, anti-trans rhetoric has moved from the fringes to the mainstream. The numbers tell the story: The Trevor Project saw a 700% increase in calls, texts and chats compared to prior weeks after the election results were announced.

Trump’s campaign spent over $20 million on ads attacking trans people, with about 41% of the campaign’s ad spending focused on messaging around trans people. Project 2025 – which Trump claims he doesn’t support but was written by his former cabinet members – calls for removing terms related to gender identity from every federal document and labels gender-affirming care as “child abuse.”

This rhetoric has real consequences. When political leaders denounce trans people’s very existence, it emboldens bigots to act on their hate. We’re seeing this play out in states across the country, with 26 states passing legislation banning gender-affirming care for minors and other anti-trans laws.

What Now?

I wish I had better news. I wish I could tell you things will get better soon. But what I can tell you is this: we must keep fighting. We must keep saying their names. We must keep showing up for our trans siblings – not just today, but every day.

To my trans readers: You are seen. You are valued. You deserve to live authentically and safely.

To my cis readers: It’s not enough to not be transphobic. You need to be actively anti-transphobic. Speak up. Show up. Vote. Donate to trans organizations. Support trans businesses. And most importantly, listen to trans voices and amplify them.

Because next year, I don’t want to write another article listing 29 more names. Or any names at all.

[Note: If you’re struggling, The Trevor Project’s crisis line is available 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386. You are not alone.]

The post Trans Day of Remembrance 2024: We’re Losing Too Many appeared first on Sex Positive.

Though traveling feels like an escape from your regular schedule, there are still aspects of our typical routine that we can’t escape (taking birth control pills, using condoms, maintaining an ideal pH balance, etc.) or aspects that we could likely skip if need be, but probably won’t (masturbation).

To avoid any mishaps and manage expectations, here are five things you should know about maintaining your routine sexual and reproductive health practices while traveling:

When crossing time zones, take your birth control pill every day during the timeframe from your original time zone.

When taking the contraceptive pill, it’s essential that you take it every day at the same time. Giulia Guerrini, the lead pharmacist at the digital pharmacy Medino, says, “This means that when you’re traveling across time zones, you need to ensure that you’re still taking your pill at the same time as your home time zone.”

“The progestogen-only pill must be taken within the same three hours each day and the desogestrel progestogen-only pill must be taken within the same 12 hours each day,” adds Guerrini.

It’s also worth noting that other forms of contraception, such as the ring and patch, are not as time-sensitive as the pill, as the ring is changed every three weeks and the patch is changed weekly.

You can skip your period by starting a new pack of pills earlier, but there may be some drawbacks.

Staci Tanouye, MD, FACOG explains, “If you skip the placebo week, take your pills continuously, and skip your period, the pills maintain the same thin lining and continue to prevent any thickening of the endometrium.”  However, the downside to this is that the longer you continuously take your oral contraceptive pills, the more likely you are to get breakthrough bleeding and spotting due to a lining that’s getting too thin and therefore unstable.

“It’s not at all harmful, just annoying,” Tanouye elaborates.

If you’ll be out of town when your refill is scheduled to arrive, the likelihood that you can get over-the-counter birth control varies significantly by country.

If you’re in the US, emergency refills can usually be transferred to a local pharmacy, but there is the risk that insurance won’t cover it. If you’re traveling out of the country and you’re not able to access your birth control abroad, use condoms or internal condoms to prevent pregnancy and STIs.

“If you’re abroad in Europe, you can ask your doctor to give you a prescription to use in another EU country, also known as a ‘cross-border prescription,” adds Guerrini.

In cases like these, the best thing anyone can do is plan. Speak to your doctor or pharmacist, explain that you will be away from home, and request a larger prescription.

If you’re going on a vacation with your lover, be mindful of policies regarding unmarried couples staying in the same room.

Laws are not made equal. Even in the U.S., laws vary from state to state, so you can imagine the differences when you cross the international border. Some countries are welcoming to unwed couples, solo travelers, and the LGBTQ community, but many countries across the seas are not. When traveling, make sure you research the considerations you need to take while planning your travels with a partner.

You can bring sex toys when you’re traveling, but there may be restrictions.

According to TSA regulations, flying with adult toys in the U.S. is generally permitted. However, whether your sex toy makes it through the checkpoint is up to the TSA officer handling your bag. Keep in mind that not all countries have the same regulations as the U.S. when it comes to sex toys. Some countries that may not allow you to travel with these personal items include India, Saudi Arabia, the United Arab Emirates, Thailand, Vietnam, and the Maldives.

Ultimately, regardless of what method of birth control you use or what kind of sexual activity you’re planning on doing while you’re traveling, it’s always best to consider every scenario before you leave. By considering every possibility that may happen, you’ll at least be prepared to take any necessary measures and have less to worry about while you’re on vacation.

The post 5 Ways To Take Control Of Your Sexual & Reproductive Health While Traveling appeared first on Sex Positive.

That’s right. We’re somehow over halfway through October and Halloween is approaching faster than a trick-or-treating child on unlimited Skittles. With the clock ticking, it’s time to get serious about something important: your costume.

With just weeks left until the big day, Sexual + Being figured we’d chime in to help you as you prepare to don thee now your gay Halloweeniest attire. From frightful to fantastical to downright horny, we’d done all the hard work (you know, concepting and planning; you’re welcome!) so you can have fun and stay mentally, physically, and sexually healthy.

Giddy up, cow-theys!

Western is in, don’t you know? It has been practically in every fashion house and ad campaign out there this year. Everyone say “Thank you, Beyoncé.” So, why not get into it? 

The chaps (a**less, preferred, of course). The bolo ties. The mixed prints. Heck, even a lasso to wrangle yourself something fun. Whatever your inspo, make it sexy and rodeo-ready.

Then, make like the cowboys, girls, and theys before us and spice up that sex life with new sex positions. The obvious ones are there … but we’ll leave all those to your untamed imagination. Just get into something new and experiment with your partners like the farm animals that you are. 

Channel your Midwestern Princess

If your kink is karma, this one’s for you! 

Pop sensation Chappell Roan has a style, look, and feel entirely her own. Her badassery and individuality make for the perfect emotional inspiration behind The Look™ — and those tremendous ‘fits of hers make it all the more fun and exciting. Plus, it comes with a message. 

Throughout this year, Roan has been more than open with her mental health journey. So, live into her fully, take a quick check-in with yourself to do the same. Check out some DC Health resources that will help keep you and your fellow Pink Pony Clubbers safer mentally.

Brats stay bumpin’ that (safely)

Oh, did you think brat summer was over?! No no, Halloween is still brat as all hell.

Long-time pop sensation Charli xcx made a cultural moment this year out of a string of spectacular club anthems, some green-tinted party-girl antics, and a dream. Is there anything else you could want out of Halloween?! The options are endless here: The titular brat green album cover, one of Charli’s many collaborators, the woman herself, or anything your little heart desires. 

But, of course, it’s important to make like our patron saint of club-classic debauchery and make sure you’re in the party for the long — and very safe — haul. Halloween can be a hotbed of consumption (alcohol, drugs, candy, etc.), so be sure to partake responsibly. 

Get hot for teacher

Ok, this one is not as original … but go with it. Because its lessons can be quite literal.

Everyone has seen the movies and heard about the stories and fantasies of the hot teacher. If you’re lucky enough, you may have one in your life or call one yours your study partner now. Plus, you likely have some of these items in your closet now. A win-win!

You really cannot go wrong with this rule-carrying classic. And, if you really want to go for it, make yourself the sex ed teacher of your dreams and remind everyone about the safe sex practices at the core of their lessons: consistent testing, using condoms, and more.

Let’s get electoral with it

Call us a regular Political Patty but, hey, we’re coming to you live from the nation’s capital. Things on Halloween are bound to get political … so why not join the herd?

In the circus that is national politics, there is more than enough inspiration for your costume. There are our presidential candidates themselves, their running mates, and a wide variety of options. Think out-of-the-ballot-box on this one.

Jokes aside, we may be suggesting political dress-up here but the stakes have never been higher in this election no matter where you are or how you vote. Take a moment to think through your Election Day plan, make sure you’re registered (DC residents, same-day registration is possible), and vote with your health (sexual or otherwise) and community in mind. 

Uh-oh, you got a sext! 

A new bombshell — you! — has entered the proverbial villa.

Ok, we’ll fess up: we are not handing out villas or trips to Fiji. Maybe next year. But that does not mean you can get your dose of “fun in the sun” in your Love Island USA best. Let us help you with some delicious inspiration.

Think scantily clad bathing suits, shimmery sarongs, and more than your fair dose of flexing (likely literally and physically). You really cannot go wrong here as long as you’re suited for summer and ready to get your flirt on. As you get all prettied up, take a pre-H-ween party look at some resources that will help keep you hot, sexy, and STI-free.

Well, there you have it, zom-babes! Some fodder to inspire your sexiest and safest Halloween yet. For more resources, be sure to check out sexualbeing.org. Happy haunting and humping!

The post 6 costume ideas to have your sexiest (and safest) Halloween yet appeared first on Sex Positive.

Historically, the word “brat” brings up feelings of childhood or teenage angst, being used in a somewhat derogatory way to describe an ill-mannered adolescent. But, modern pop culture has reclaimed that title, now referring to the word brat refers as someone who is confidently rebellious, unapologetically bold, and playfully defiant.

In an Instagram post on June 8, Charli XCX described her album as “me, my flaws, my f— ups, my ego all rolled into one.” It’s no surprise that this new definition of “brat” has given the younger generation the courage to embrace their individuality and a carefree attitude, often with spunky tendencies and a love for living life on the unhinged side. In a lot of ways, “Brat Summer” is an updated version of Meg thee Stallion’s “Hot Girl Summer”, inspiring women all over the world to be their most authentic selves, even if that means rejecting traditional societal expectations and norms.

But summer has ended and fall is has begun, so where do we go from here?

Luckily, we can (and should) still bring the concept of brat summer and its values with us into the new season, the rest of the year, and the rest of our lives. One of the ingredients to living a fulfilling life is by building confidence in who we are at our core. And part of what makes us who we are as human beings is through our sexuality.

For women especially, conversations and narratives about sexuality typically place us in a passive role — which totally goes against the essence of brat. In a world where our society teaches women to shrink themselves, the concept of brat tells us to be bold and take up space. When it comes to sex and relationships, the concept of brat can look like a lot of things. It could mean intentionally discovering what feels pleasurable for you, bringing your sexual fantasies to life, starting a sex podcast, or making sure you orgasm too when having sex (especially with a male partner, considering how scary the orgasm gap is for heterosexual women).

Here are other, more specific ways to incorporate the ideas and values of brat summer in your relationships and sex lives:

• Visit a resource center for sexual health. Nothing is sexier than knowledge, so check out sex-positive organizations around the world that offer educational resources, workshops, research opportunities, and more! Two personal favorites are the Center for Positive Sexuality and The Pleasure Chest
• Get tested for infections. Part of taking ownership of your sexual health requires staying up to date with your status by getting tested regularly for sexually transmitted infections (STIs) or other annoying yet equally manageable infections like urinary tract infections (UTIs) and yeast infections. Sometimes our bodies have inconvenient reactions, but that’s nothing to be ashamed of, and getting tested is a right of passage.
• Try a new toy. Nothing screams “brat” quite like experimentation. So, why not add a new toy to place on your nightstand?
• Admire your body in front of the mirror. Above all else, confidence is key. So, do yourself a favor by grabbing a mirror and admiring the way you look. Bonus points if you give yourself endless compliments while doing so!

The post Bye-bye Brat Summer, Hello Brat Fall? Bringing Positive Trends Into the New Season appeared first on Sex Positive.

Abortion: The Never-Ending Story

Since Roe v. Wade got the boot in 2022, it’s been a wild ride for abortion rights. Some states are building fortresses around reproductive freedom, while others are competing to see who can make the most draconian laws. (Congrats, we’re all winners in the Worst Timeline Olympics!)

Kamala Harris: Defender of the Uterus

• In the past: As a senator, Harris opposed the Hyde Amendment and co-sponsored the Women’s Health Protection Act, which would have blocked states from imposing restrictive policies limiting access to abortion, and voted against a bill that would have banned abortions later in pregnancy. As VP, she’s been the administration’s loudest voice on reproductive rights. She’s also the only VP or president to visit a Planned Parenthood clinic while in office. Plus, the Biden-Harris administration has been busy defending abortion access, including:
  • Affirming that abortions may be appropriate for emergency medical conditions under EMTALA.
  • Revising FDA restrictions on medication abortion pills.

• Strengthening HIPAA protections for abortion-related data privacy.

• On the campaign trail: Harris vows to never allow a national abortion ban and promises to sign legislation restoring Roe v. Wade protections nationwide. 

Bonus: VP pick Governor Tim Walz of Minnesota signed a bill codifying abortion rights and an executive order protecting out-of-state abortion seekers. Because apparently some politicians remember that their job is to, you know, help people.

Donald Trump: The “I Made This Mess, But It’s Not My Problem” Candidate

• In the past: Appointed the Supreme Court justices who overturned Roe v. Wade (which he loves to brag about, having said “After 50 years of failure, with nobody coming even close, I was able to kill Roe v. Wade.”). His administration also blocked Title X funding for clinics providing abortion counseling or referrals.
• On the campaign trail: Claims he supports leaving abortion to the states, but has hinted at considering a national 15 or 16-week ban and has refused to commit to vetoing a national abortion ban. He did, however, recently indicate during an interview that he would not use a 19th-century anti-obscenity law, the Comstock Act, to restrict abortion pills, and that he supports exceptions for rape, incest, and the life of the mother (because apparently some forced births are less acceptable than others).

And let’s not forget JD Vance, who sponsored at least seven anti-abortion bills during his time as a senator, including bills to defund Planned Parenthood, and a so-called “born-alive” bill to prohibit healthcare providers from failing to provide proper care to a child who survives an abortion attempt.

On the Ballot

Abortion-related initiatives are on the ballot in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Maryland, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, and New York. So if you live in one of those states, congrats! You get to directly influence your reproductive rights. (No pressure or anything.)

The future of abortion access hangs in the balance, and your vote could be the difference between bodily autonomy and forced birth.

Contraception: Because Apparently It’s Still 1965

Despite 88% of Americans believing birth control is morally acceptable (including 86 percent of Republicans and 93 percent of Democrats), some politicians seem determined to drag us back to the era of chastity belts and rhythm method roulette. And after Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas writing in his concurring opinion overturning Roe v. Wade that the court should reconsider decisions relying on the same legal precedent – which includes the court’s 1965 ruling in Griswold v. Connecticut guaranteeing the right to contraceptives – one in five Americans say they believe access to birth control is under threat.

Kamala Harris: Team “Let’s Not Go Backward”

• In the past: Supports the ACA’s contraceptive coverage requirement as well as expanded access to contraceptives for military members and dependents. During her time as VP, the Biden-Harris administration also restored Title X family planning program rules and approved the first over-the-counter oral contraceptive pills.
• On the campaign trail: Continues to defend contraceptive access and supports increased access to over-the-counter birth control.

Donald Trump: Mixed Messages and Moral Objections

• In the past: His administration allowed nearly any employer to opt out of contraceptive coverage for “religious or moral” reasons. Because apparently your boss’s imaginary friend has more say over your uterus than you do. Trump’s contraception legacy also includes:
  • Prohibiting family planning clinics from receiving Title X funds if they also offer abortion services.
  • Approving Texas’s Medicaid program waiver blocking payments to Planned Parenthood for non-abortion family planning services.
• On the campaign trail: Recently claimed he wouldn’t restrict contraception access, but his track record and the “Project 2025” policy initiative suggest otherwise.

Whether you’ll be able to get birth control without jumping through flaming hoops may depend on who wins in November. Choose wisely!

IVF: The Unexpected Battleground

In a plot twist that surprised absolutely no one who’s been paying attention, IVF access is now under threat in some states. Because apparently some people think that if you can’t conceive naturally, you don’t deserve to be a parent (insert eye roll here.)

Kamala Harris: Pro-Science, Pro-Family

• In the past: Spoke out against the Alabama Supreme Court ruling that threatened IVF access.
• On the campaign trail: Supports guaranteed right to IVF.

Donald Trump: Flip-Flopping for Votes

• In the past: No clear stance during his presidency. His running mate, Vance, voted to block nationwide access to IVF. Because nothing says “pro-life” like preventing people from creating life, am I right?
• On the campaign trail: Recently claimed he’d support public funding for IVF or mandate insurance coverage. But his party’s platform includes language that could threaten IVF access. So… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The future of family planning through IVF hangs in the balance. Choose your fighter wisely!

Maternity Care: Because Pregnancy Shouldn’t Be a Death Sentence

In a country with rising maternal mortality rates (they’ve nearly doubled between 2018 and 2021), especially among women of color, maternity care is a critical issue. Let’s see how our candidates stack up.

Kamala Harris: Champion of Moms

• In the past: Long-time advocate for improved maternal health care and reducing racial disparities, including the extension of Medicaid coverage to one year postpartum (which enacted under the Biden-Harris Administration). The Biden-Harris administration also issued a Blueprint on maternal health setting cross-agency priorities, including workforce development, enhanced data collection, mental health, and doula coverage.
• On the campaign trail: Supports implementing a cross-agency maternal health blueprint.

Donald Trump: A Mixed Bag

• In the past: Signed the Preventing Maternal Deaths Act of 2018 and implemented a model to improve care for pregnant and postpartum women with opioid use disorder.
• On the campaign trail: No clear promises on maternity care for his potential second term.

Whether you’re planning to have kids or just want to make sure your friends don’t die in childbirth, this is an issue worth considering at the ballot box.

Register to Vote in DC: Because Your Voice Matters (No, Really)

Alright, DCers, listen up! Here’s how to make sure you can actually vote on all this stuff:

1. Check your registration status: Head to https://apps.dcboe.org/vrs and make sure you’re good to go.
2. Register online: If you’re not registered, you’ve got until October 15, 2024, to do it online for the November 5 election.
3. Procrastinator’s option: You can also register on Election Day at your polling place. 

Bonus info for the justice-involved: As of July 2020, incarcerated individuals, people under court supervision, and those in halfway houses can register and vote! Use your DC home address or the jail address if you’ve been there for at least 30 days.

Look, I get it. Voting can feel pointless, especially when it comes to issues that feel like they should be basic human rights. But the reality is, your reproductive freedom, your access to healthcare, and even your ability to start a family are on the ballot this year. So register, show up, and vote like your uterus depends on it. Because, well, it kind of does.

The post 2024 Elections: What’s on the Ticket for Sexual Health? appeared first on Sex Positive.

Seas of new faces have arrived in our fair city to study at one of our many esteemed collegiate institutions, bringing with them boxes of clothes, their hopes and dreams, and, of course, their supercharged hormones. 

It doesn’t matter where your alumni allegiance may lie *cough, #RaiseHigh GW, cough* this is a time for excitement and learning in ways that only DC’s colleges and universities know how. In keeping with that educational spirit, Sexual + Being wanted to join in on the fun and teach students a thing or two about what we know best: safer sex practices, tips, and resources.

Here’s what every college student should know about safer sex this fall.

Brace for (literal?) impact

I could insert almost endless puns related to this section, but we mean business here, so I’ll refrain. Let’s start by stating the obvious: college can be wild, especially when it comes to understanding our bodies and the ins and outs of having a sex life. 

You will undergo an almost endless amount of new experiences in your four-plus years roaming your college’s halls and many of them are tied to sex. Brace yourself here, folks, because it can be a journey. What’s most important is to remember you are in control of your body. Trust your gut when it comes to having intimate sexual encounters and do not feel the need to do anything you are not ready to do — and with whomever shows you interest at the risk of your own feelings. 

You know we’re sex-positive here (it’s basically in our name) so boink away as long as you and your partners are into it.

Consent above all

We’ll keep this section short n’ sweet (thank you, Sabrina Carpenter) because it should be the easiest to understand. Mutual consent is the most important sex practice, particularly when talking about safety when we’re “doing the deed.”

All parties participating in whatever sexual fun you are trying to get into must give their approval and agreement before anything starts. No is “no” the first time it is uttered or when someone pulls away from an interaction or attempt. Then you immediately stop, full stop.

It is not rocket science here. Just be courteous of your partner(s) and ask before making a move. More likely than not, your partner(s) will feel respected and connected to you in ways that will make the entire hook-up more explosive.

Get into a testing routine

Ok, now that we have our minds in alignment, it’s time to talk about our physical health as it relates to sex. That buck starts with getting tested for STIs and how often you do it.

If you are sexually active, it is crucial that you get into a regular testing routine to ensure you maintain your health as you’re getting down and dirty. A partner can swear up and down that they are “clean” (while we’re here, please remove this phrase from your lexicon; it’s rude and inaccurate, thanks! ) but only test results can guarantee that. 

Your testing cadence is up to you and your medical professional. For those often participating in sexual activity, you should consider more consistent testing (i.e., every few months or so) and always when receiving news of an exposure. Testing is a key to STI prevention! 

Don’t forget the rubbers and pills

But testing is not the only key to maintaining sexual health here. Condoms, dental dams, STI medications, and birth control are also invaluable tools in maintaining your sexual health. 

For those having sexual relations with someone with a penis (their own or others), condom usage during sex (vaginal, anal, oral) can greatly decrease the risk of STI exposure or unwanted pregnancy. And, no, they are not “too big” to fit in one so don’t let them try to weasel their way around it if it makes you feel more comfortable. 

For those having sex with vagina-having individuals, dental dams function similarly to condoms but in sheet form. Consider using these to prevent skin-to-skin and/or skin-to-oral contact that may spread STIs further. 

Three tried-and-true medicines you should also consider can drastically increase your bodily safety: PrEP, PEP, and birth control pills. 

• The first two are used to stop the contraction of HIV either before (PrEP, which stands for pre-exposure prophylaxis) or after (PEP, which stands for post-exposure prophylaxis) exposure, revolutionizing how the virus spreads. This is particularly recommended for LGBTQ+ folks, as they are among the most impacted groups as it relates to HIV. 
• Birth control pills (or implants) are prescribed to those individuals with vaginas who are seeking to prevent pregnancy. A baby, of course, is not an STI but it can impact your sexual health as well as your mental health, financial situation, and more. 

These are the infinity stones of sexual health, friends. Why not collect (read: try) the ones that work for you?

Leave shame at the door

Now that you get the landscape, let’s close with time-tested sexy-time advice. At the end of the day, your sex life is yours and it’s important to understand yourself through this lens.

If you do not want to have sex, do not have it! If you want to have tons of it, go (safely!) *uckwild! Put in the work to find your sexual self by experimenting with what you like, listening to what your mind and body tell you, and putting in the work to erase thoughts of bodily shame. 

Happy humping, students! For more resources related to sexual health, check out sexualbeing.org. 

The post Back to School 101: How to put the ‘safe’ in safer sex practices appeared first on Sex Positive.

Every year, thousands of football fans fly from various locations across the country (and from outside the United States) to attend the long-awaited Super Bowl. After a full season of hard work and determination, people around the world tune in virtually and in person to see the best athletes compete, show off their talent, and apply the skills they’ve accumulated throughout the past several months. However, this concept of a final display of entertainment or celebration of the top people in a particular career path goes beyond football.

Other career paths have their own version of the Super Bowl too. The music industry version of the Super Bowl is the Grammys. The film industry has the Oscars. The fashion industry has the Met Gala. And, last but not least, the sexuality field’s version of the Super Bowl is the annual conference hosted by AASECT, the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists.

AASECT is the largest organization to certify sexuality professionals, providing opportunities for training, community, and visibility to promote understanding of human sexuality and healthy sexual behavior. In other words, being an AASECT-certified educator, counselor or therapist is like being a chef who earned a Michelin star. It’s a pretty big deal. It’s also a big deal to have the honor of speaking at AASECT’s annual conference or even being involved with such a prestigious event whether you’re on the conference planning committee, volunteering, or attending.

This year’s conference was hosted at the prestigious St. Louis Union Station Hotel, a remarkable venue in Missouri that offered spacious rooms with jaw-dropping interior design, mouth-watering food, and tons of space for hundreds of sexuality professionals from across the globe. The conference’s theme was “All Together Now: Lifting Our Voice for Community.”

According to the organizers of the conference, this year’s theme was inspired by a new sexual revolution, empowering all bodies, sizes, abilities, races, ages, genders, and sexual orientations to come together to protect our society’s freedom of choice, expression, and bodily autonomy. “In a time when fundamental human rights are not guaranteed, we face some of the most significant challenges of our time. AASECT joins in answering new calls to collective liberation — where underutilized and historically oppressed voices are centered, where advocacy is transformed into action, and where we can create a more just world for all of us,” AASECT announced as an opening statement to kick off the 4-day conference.

It didn’t take long into the conference for attendees to realize how engaging the learning experience would be. The presentations included information on topics like the improvement of parent-child sex education among Muslims, LGBTQ legislation across the country, the healing of past trauma through kink & BDSM, and more.

Dr. Debby Herbenick, an internationally recognized sexual and reproductive health professor and researcher gave the presentation “The Rise of Rough Sex: What Sexuality Professionals Need to Know About Today’s Emerging Trends” and it was certainly a crowd favorite, More studies have shown that rough sex (e.g., choking, smothering, face slapping, genital slapping, name-calling) has increased dramatically in prevalence.

Interesting fact from the presentation: A 2020 campus-representative survey of nearly 5000 college students showed that 80% had ever engaged in rough sex.

Herbenick’s presentation analyzed this research and other recent studies on rough sex to address its prevalence, frequency, and styles, as well as implications for communication, consent, mental health, and physical health.

Another noteworthy presentation was the “Sex & Love Around the World: A Deep Dive Into Cultural Influences on Sexuality & Sexual Function” panel. Did you know that sexual dysfunction affects up to a third of Americans, impairing sexuality, intimate relationships, and mental health? The “Sex & Love Around the World” panel of multiple professionals in the field discussed how Americans are slowly but surely shifting from a medicalized view of providing sex therapy to a more holistic approach to the treatment of sexual issues. The panel also compared and contrasted how other cultures across different continents conceptualize values and dilemmas regarding sex and relationships.

Another educational highlight was the presentation “Finding the Room Next Door (to the Room Where It Happens)” by Dr. Emily Nagoski, a famous sex educator and author of Come as You Are. She used an interactive and artistic approach to navigating the loss of desire and other changes in sexual responsiveness by mapping our “emotional floorplans.” To help the crowd understand their turn-on triggers, Nagoski facilitated group activities among the crowd, asking the following questions and prompts:

• How do you know you’re in the space of lust and/or romance?
• What happens in your body, thoughts, and emotions when you’re there?
• How do you feel about this space?
• What pulls you into that space, and what pushes you out?
• Write or talk about a time that you were in this space. What did you like about it? Where were you before you got into this space?

There was more to learn, but if we re-capped everything in all the presentations, there wouldn’t be enough room in this review to talk about other noteworthy parts of the conference, like Kinky Bingo and the Dazzling Drag Show!

Kinky Bingo was hosted during the evening of day 2 of the conference. If you’re scratching your head wondering what kinky bingo entails, it’s a bold and tantalizing twist on the classic game. Imagine regular bingo cards, but instead of placing your chip on the board for spaces like B12 or G51, you place your chip on spaces like “riding crop” underneath the B column or “golden shower” underneath the G column. And of course, the winners received prizes risqué like flavored lube, high-tech sex toys, and BDSM accessories.

Next, the Dazzling Drag Show was hosted on the evening of 3 of the conference. As you can imagine, it was a fun night full of glitter, glamor, and grand performances. The crowd came dressed to impress while watching the high-energy dance-offs and lip-sync battles. The impromptu “Who can lick the pudding from the pudding cup the fastest?” competition was a nice addition to the event too.

Ultimately, the 2024 AASECT conference will always go down as one of the most memorable conferences of all time. The atmosphere was unreal and each day felt like a family reunion regardless of whether people had already known each other for years or just met each other in person despite following each other on social media since the pandemic.

Curious about AASECT’s plans for next year? We won’t leave you hanging, so here’s a sneak peek: The next AASECT conference will be held June 4-7, 2025, at the JW Marriott Las Vegas Resort & Spa in Las Vegas! If you’re interested in being a speaker, stay tuned because the call for 2025 abstracts will open by the end of the month.

To stay updated with upcoming news about AASECT, look through their website’s homepage here and sign up for their newsletter!

The post Here’s What It’s Like to Attend AASECT, the Conference Known As the Sexology Super Bowl appeared first on Sex Positive.